Feeling…

This isn’t my first time around in the crazy rodeo of cross country relocation. But in a way I feel it’s harder knowing what feelings I can expect to come in the days ahead. 

Lonely. I won’t know anyone. Literally, not a single familiar face in a 500 mile radius. I will have to start from scratch. New groups, new events, new co-workers, new neighbors, which will all lead to eventual new friends. But the weeks and months between first meeting, building up to great friends, is a long and extremely lonely process. At least this time I’ll have my dog as a companion. 


Lost. I won’t have any idea where I am, anywhere I go. There’ll be new towns, new roads, new stores. I’ll have to use a gps just to get home from the grocery store. People will mention a nearby town and I won’t have a clue which direction it is or how far away. But I guess that’s actually part of what I like about going new places; you never know what’s ahead. 


Nostalgic. My final days in Tulsa are just like my final days in Molalla. I drove by ORU today had had to pull over and stare at the campus for a minute. Seeing the Praying Hands I recalled my first adventure with Jessica on the day I met her. We participated in a scavenger hunt together not knowing what good friends we would become. I saw the library where I first became study buddies with Dawn, not knowing we would one day travel to Nashville together, then West Virginia, then Asia with a million laughs along the way. I saw the cafeteria where Michael first invited me to eat with his pals, which introduced me to Cristina, and between the two of them I got into so many wild excursions from middle of the night star gazing, to destinationless drives, learning to salsa dance in a park, to finding favorite Chinese buffets on accident. So many memories began by first stepping foot on that campus. And it hit me today that I will likely never step foot on the campus again. 


Hopeful. In Tulsa I had to drive 3 hours to find any good hiking trails, 8 hours to the nearest beach, 10 hours to the closest mountain actually big enough to fit the title “mountain”. In New Hampshire there are trails in every town, the beach is 30 minutes from me, and the mountains are 45 minutes. If I want a really exciting time, New York City is 4 hours away. There’s so much adventure yet to be had. Just as I had to leave my comforts and memories of Molalla to start a life in Tulsa, I am hopeful and excited for what new people and places await me in my new life in New Hampshire. 


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